It's a D in my inBox
If you are a female, been online dating and have never received unsolicited d**k pic, I must ask, have you been online dating?
Er’body and their mama know that you’ve not been inducted into the world of online dating until you open your inbox, and there in all its glory is a D pic. If you are one of the lucky few, then congrats but lemme tell you, there will come the day where your eyes will see what they wish they could unsee: limp D!
Now to be fair, I cannot say only a certain group: age race, nationality, are known to be unsolicited d**k pic senders, because like I always say, Fu*k boyz come in all nationality, religion, race…they are all some equal opportunity douchelords. They don’t discriminate.
So this guy and i were chatting, nothing suspect, the usual. The next time I opened my app, and clicked into our message, there it was, good ol Mr. Unwanted D.
You know when you feel like you are doing something really bad, so you stop and look around to see if anyone else is around, lest they catch you being naughty naughty. That was my reaction, like o my goodness, my eyes! Warrisdis?
First of all, aren’t you ashamed? WHY WHY WHY are you sending a stranger on the inter-web your D? What is it supposed to do to me or for me? Am I supposed to burn with desire for you now? or jump through the phone to experience it? Am I supposed to feel special? You are there sending pictures of your D while your mates are asking where my dream destination is, so we can fly there, or asking about my favorite cuisine, so they can suggest a new restaurant in town. Your own selling point is sending me a pic of your ashy, dusty, raisin D! My guy receive sense.
You know what gets me is that they stand in front of a mirror! where their own reflection is starring right back at them, and so I’m wondering, did you not see yourself? catch a glimpse and come back to your senses, like ask yourself, WTF am I doing? No? You were pleased with yourself an spent the time to:
2.) Open camera
3.) Snap multiple shots, because i am sure, you wanted to make sure you got the good light and angle
4.) Launch dating app
5.)Find the recipient
6.) Insert picture/Send
In the case of D sender, I deleted the chat because I just could not…I mean I was speechless and NO it was not because the thing in question took my breath away, it was just from sheer amusement that people felt confident, and comfortable sending such intimate pictures to strangers.
Later when you want to run for office, and your opponent blast your D pic all over the news, you will say it is your village people that is doing you, not knowing it’s your own lack of gumption that won’t let you be great.
My sisters in dating, do not dignify a D pic with a response. Delete, block, and report that fool.